How DeSantis Will Beat Trump in the 2024 Primary
…And Trump will refuse to concede, start his own party, split the vote, and wreck the GOP!
Imagine this:
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis decides to run against Donald Trump for the 2024 GOP presidential nomination because he smells Trump’s political blood in the proverbial water from the plethora of criminal investigations by the Department of Justice, the State of New York, and the state of Georgia, among others.
The Republican National Committee feels compelled to stop paying Trump’s legal fees because he’s not the only candidate in the primary, so the RNC is obligated to be neutral until the GOP primary voters decide who the nominee will be. Trump gets pissed off, and starts spreading rumors that the RNC will rig the primary against him. He once again refuses to support the eventual nominee if he doesn’t win.
Seeing DeSantis jump into the presidential primary, Mike Pence, Ted Cruz, Mike Pompeo, Nikki Haley, Josh Hawley, Tom Cotton, and perhaps a handful of others jump in as well, and cite the increasing number of polls showing the majority of Republican voters want to move on from Trump and his excessive controversies and scandals (the latest poll found 55%) to nominate a new standard-bearer for the party without so much political, legal, and moral baggage.
All the candidates tread lightly at first to avoid pissing off ultra MAGA voters still loyal to Trump as he gives them childish nicknames and attacks them personally, until Ron DeSantis, who is not a total Trump brown-noser like all the others, turns up the heat and expands his vote share to being tied with Trump. Meanwhile, Pence, Pompeo, Hawley, and Cotton all drop out when they get less than 1% in Iowa, and even less in New Hampshire, while Ted Cruz and Nikki Haley start fighting each other in the background and the media to be selected as the eventual Vice President candidate.
Happy that DeSantis is a fighter, and annoyed by Trump’s endless unprofessional and petty bitchiness, voters start swinging toward DeSantis. Trump declares that he got cheated in Nevada and South Carolina because he should be winning with 95% of the vote, and, when DeSantis wins the majority of delegates on Super Tuesday, Trump declares he’s quitting the primary and starting his own political party called the “Freedom Party” or some other stupid name.
Trump refuses to give up because he knows he must become president to stay out of prison and pardon himself, and will sabotage the DeSantis presidential campaign and the GOP rather than admit he lost fair and square. At the Republican National Convention, Trump tells all his supporters to attend a “Stop the Steal” rally outside the chosen convention center because “it will be wild.” Trump actually walks with the protesters inside as they brawl and chant “Hang DeSantis” until the police arrest him and supporters en masse.
When his Freedom Party polls at only 15% of the electorate in the general election, Trump will accuse both parties of rigging it against him, and demand all his loyal MAGA supporters boycott the election. Then Democrats win in a massive blue wave big majorities in both chambers of Congress.
Or, if the States of Georgia and New York or the Department of Justice actually indict and arrest Trump ahead of the primary, Trump runs from prison even more dedicated to winning to pardon himself and avoid spending the rest of his life behind bars. In a similar fashion, he refuses to drop out, splits the GOP vote, and fulfills Senator Lindsey Graham’s prophesy that “If we nominate Trump, we will get destroyed and we will deserve it.”
This might be speculative, but Donald Trump is so impulsively petty, obsessed with vengeance, and psychologically incapable of admitting he’s a loser that it’s as possible as any other outcome.
Also, side note, it’s funny that the GOP might very well follow a candidate name Donald with a candidate named Ronald.
MORE OF MY COMEDY !
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And check out Brain Milk’s latest podcast episode! Put that baby on 1.5x speed and get a dose of liberal news with 2% fat!
Thanks for your eyeball attention!
-Dash MacIntyre
Follow me on Twitter at @HalfwayPost to interrupt your daily doomscrolling with graffiti news and Dada humor, and follow me on Medium to keep up with my daily writing studio.
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