A U-Haul Full Of Proud Boys Accidentally Gave Themselves Carbon Monoxide Poisoning

And this week's other graffiti news headlines!

Photo by Adam Bignell on Unsplash

• A U-Haul full of masked neo-Nazis accidentally gave themselves carbon monoxide poisoning by idling too long in a parking garage before driving to the Pride Parade they intended to protest at.

• A masked ICE official who just got arrested off the street for being an undocumented member of law enforcement says it’s cruel that he’s being jailed in a city he has never lived in.

• Iranian military officials just released a TikTok video from inside the Fordo nuclear facility of themselves dancing while holding several canisters of the uranium Donald Trump keeps insisting were “totally obliterated.”

• Trump reportedly really wants to use a nuclear weapon at some point in his presidency to look tough, but he’s afraid everyone will just make humiliating mushroom penis jokes about it.

• Because the ICE hotline operators have caught on to pranksters calling to report an undocumented girl named “Anne Frank” hiding in random buildings’ attics to waste ICE’s time, the pranksters are now using the name “Ana Francisco” and the prank is working again.

• Trump says if he can just finally get a Nobel Peace Prize he’ll consider resigning so he can “quit while I’m on top.”

• Trump Administration officials are reportedly beginning to worry their badgeless, unidentified, masked ICE agents are in huge legal jeopardy if blue states and cities start prosecuting them for the felony of impersonating law enforcement.

• A new poll found that 86% of Americans think the US would get better if an asteroid hit the Bezos wedding and took out all the billionaires, robber barons, crony capitalists, influencers, and cultural gatekeepers in attendance.

• Residents of New York City are reportedly crowd-sourcing a fund to offer complimentary moving vans to any billionaires who want to flee the city because of Zohran Mamdani to move to rural Mississippi.

• Congressional Republicans reportedly want to create a new AI surveillance tool intended to spy on everyone’s social media activity, but they’re worried it will inadvertently out a bunch of closeted Republicans.

• Democrats say the aerial photos of the damage Iran’s nuclear facilities sustained from Trump’s bombing were “drawn all over in Sharpie.”

• Trump says if the next Democratic president gets a Nobel Peace Prize he will tell his supporters to start a new civil war.

• Local MAGA fans are wondering why Donald Trump never responds to allegations and jokes about him being “Best Pedophiles Forever” together with Jeffrey Epstein when he reacts like a little bitch about every other criticism or insult anyone says.

• Mitch McConnell says Republicans have been passing garbage budgets full of tax breaks for the rich and horrific cuts to social spending for decades, so what’s the fuss about the Big Beautiful Bill?

• Staff at the venue Jeff Bezos got married at reportedly locked all the bathrooms during the ceremony so all the rich attendees had to pee in water bottles like Amazon employees.

• The company that provides ICE with rubber bullet guns has reportedly started sending ICE clown guns that shoot out little flags that say “What you’re doing is unConstitutional.”

• A new AI program designed to identify unpatriotic Americans has reportedly flagged Donald Trump as the biggest America hater in the country citing how constantly he trashes on the US and most of the people who live here.

• Ron DeSantis is reportedly worried Donald Trump will someday imprison him in the Everglades prison he’s currently building. 🥃

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