22 Comments
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Nancy Swim's avatar

Don’t forget to call cyber trucks Deplorians.

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The Halfway Cafe's avatar

That's a great nickname too :D

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James Weese's avatar

Doesn't matter if they're satire, THIS one needs to be spread across the world. So simple yet so brilliant and great potential to piss the douche off :P

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The Halfway Cafe's avatar

That's my hope for virality... manifesting the national conversation I want to see :D

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Gretchen Getsinger's avatar

I saw one of Melon’s swastitrucks this afternoon. Uglier than a home made barbecue pit….

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anne landryn's avatar

So the one about the banker is satire?

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The Halfway Cafe's avatar

Yes lol

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Cathie Wilson's avatar

😂😂

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Paula Walla's avatar

Thank you!’ I needed this today! It’s brilliantly hysterical!!!

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The Halfway Cafe's avatar

I write daily comedy to help us all get through these next four years :D

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Paula Walla's avatar

Thank goodness for you!!! We need you and this more than ever!! I shared and posted. I’ll keep doing so!! Laughter is the best medicine!! I’ll buy you coffee when I can too!!! Appreciate you!!!!

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The Halfway Cafe's avatar

You're so kind! :D

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Dee Doo's avatar

Let's push this out! It's just as "truthful" as anything the "media" is putting out there.

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The Halfway Cafe's avatar

It's still more truthful than anything Trump says :D

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JJ-TaxNinny's avatar

Haha!

XXPOSE ISSUES OFFICIAL PRESS RELEASE

In response to the GOP’s escalating panic, XXPose has released a formal statement:

"For too long, powerful men have harassed, coerced, and exploited young women under the assumption that their positions shield them from consequences. We at XXPose say: No more. Our exposé will include the real, unedited messages—from Bible verse-fueled come-ons to the boldest misuse of government-funded Venmo accounts we’ve ever seen.

The full report, including timestamps, receipts, and cringe-inducing sexts that will make America collectively dry heave, will be available to the public this March.

To every woman who has ever received a ‘u up?’ text from a man who votes against reproductive rights—we see you. And we got you.

– XXPose

With the Eggplant Caucus scandal about to drop, Washington’s elite are scrambling for damage control—deleting accounts, hiring crisis PR firms, and, in at least one case, praying to AI-generated Jesus on Truth Social for a miracle.

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Andrea Stoeckel's avatar

isn't that too f'n bad. Wonder how he feels about the supports FOTUS has withdrawn for ecars

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Marc M's avatar

Wow, this is rich. Gotta love it.

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Jedi Senshi's avatar

Love these, too bad that most of your comments are satire because it would be fun watching the fallout from them.

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The Halfway Cafe's avatar

My favorite tweets of mine are the ones where I'm trying to manifest behavior out of more people. If more people bring tubas to play around the White House, or dress up in mushroom costumes to troll him at his events, or call ICE and report the real psycho illegal immigrant Elon Musk... that's success!

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Dan Berlyoung's avatar

How about Doltswagon? (full disclosure, not mine, saw it somewhere else on the internet)

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pat b's avatar

The Super Sport upgrade is coming out on April 20th

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Morning's avatar

Then I shall

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