Hello, Earthlings. I am a diplomat from the Galactic Federation, and your planetary species has finally reached a point where extra-terrestrial contact is appropriate. First off, we apologize that some of our more, how you colloquially call “asshole,” galactic associates have been less than responsible and mature in terms of their sociological studying of your planet. We apologize for all the abductions, literal pyramid schemes, and agricultural graffiti. If you’re curious, these crop circles were not coded messages, but rather depictions of our various alien species’ genitalia, making them our equivalent of your graffiti drawings of penises. They’re obscene, but, like all higher intelligence organisms, we can’t resist the occasional dick joke.
“We'll be saying a big hello to all intelligent lifeforms everywhere and to everyone else out there, the secret is to bang the rocks together, guys.”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
reminds me of ‘resident alien’ on netflix… which i found stellar…