Sitemap - 2024 - The Halfway Cafe
Expanding The Russian Meltdown
Rudy Giuliani Claims He Was Abducted By Aliens “Again”
Greenland MPs Say Trump's Hands Are "Too Small To Take Greenland"
Remember Trump Was Born In A Time Of Widespread Lead-Based Paint Use
3 Christmas Ghosts Visited Donald Trump Last Night
Matt Gaetz Vows Revenge Against "Republican Hypocrites"
If Donald Trump Roasted Every Other President
A List Of Things More Dangerous Than Drag Queens And Trans People
This Year's Top Christmas Toy For Christians Is "Fetus Dolls"
Trump's Inauguration To Be Interrupted By Hundreds Of Tubas And Trombones
A New STD Was Just Named In Honor Of Donald Trump
Syria Is Another Black Eye For Putin Bogged Down In Ukraine
Democrats Are Planning A "Project 2029" That Limits Sexual Rights For Men
Oh, No! Elon Musk Is Giving Donald Trump The Ick!
The Arab Spring In Syria Reignites
Marjorie Taylor Greene Is Going On A Dating Game Show
The Fascists Are Always Perverts
Republicans Killed The "Puppy Mill Bill"
Secret Service Memos Say Trump Is “The Fussiest Diva In US History”
QAnon Has Turned On Trump For Nominating So Many Sex Offenders
The Bible's Elisha Explains Why He Made 2 Bears Maul 42 Children
A Letter From The Front In The War On Christmas
Christians Are Blissfully Unaware Their Christmas Trees Are Pagan AF
I Was The Waiter At The Last Supper, And Jesus Was A Total Karen
Alien Advice For Humanity's Evolutionary Defects
Noah Says He’s Sorry For Bringing Chlamydia And All The Other STDs Along On The Ark
Donald Trump's Secret Questionnaire For All Staffers Just Leaked!
Tension Is Rising Between Vivek Ramaswamy and Elon Musk!
Pretentious Artspeak For Juvenile Graffiti
Senator Burt Winthrop Died 29 Years Ago, Still Won't Retire
The Internet's Dumbest 25 Personal Essays
The Return Of The Trumpian Dumpster Fire
ISIS Wants To Hire Free Agent Mike Pence To Turn The Organization Around
Dark Spin-Off Ideas For NBC's "The Office"
Things That Are Likely In Matt Gaetz's Ethics Report
Fox News Hopes Its "War On Christmas" Content Will Distract From Trump Nominating Pedophiles
Matt Gaetz Is AlLeGeDlY A Pedophile
Both Parties In Congress Are Disappointed Ted Cruz Was Reelected
God Says Trump Was A Moral Test Of Character, And Republicans Failed It
A Day In The Life Of Our New Co-President, Elon Musk
The Coming Trumpian Era Of Leopards Eating People's Faces
A Roast Of Pennsylvania By A Republican
Allen Ginsberg's "Howl," For The GenXers Who Voted In Trump
Apply To Join Trump's 2nd Term If You Meet These Requirements!
America Will Break Your Heart, Won't It?
Nothing Sexier Than Whispering In My Ear, "I Vote Democratic"
Republicans, It's Time To Flush The Toilet
Thoughts For This Weekend's Calm Before The Election Storm
A Billionaire Built Trump A Retirement Home Replicating The White House
For Millennials Who Grew Up Alongside The Internet
What Democrats Should Pay Attention To While Watching The Election
Kamala Harris Welcomes You To The Sausage-Making Of Big Tent Politics
Tony Hinchcliffe Can’t Believe Trump Would Throw Him Under The Bus
Elon Musk Is A Parasite Feeding On Twitter's Strangled Algorithm
Merrick Garland Did Not Understand The Assignment
The Political Suicide Of Voting Jill Stein Or Writing In “Free Palestine”
Friday Thoughts On The Russia-North Korea-Iran-China Axis
Mid-Week Café Thoughts, Oct 24
God Says Ted Cruz Will Lose To Colin Allred
This Is The Nightmarish Republican Utopia For Women In Project 2025
Trump Voters Are Planning A Hunger Strike If Trump Loses The Election
Don't Forget This Is All Mitch McConnell's Fault
Harris Can Trigger Trump By Mentioning His Diapers, And Should
Is There Enough Art In Your Life?
NOAA Says It'll Begin Naming Hurricanes After GOP Climate Deniers
5 Political Sunday Thoughts From A Satirist
Dash Reports What's Going On In Central Europe!
Melania Trump's New Book "Melania" Shares Gross Secrets About Her Husband
RFK Jr. And Stephen Miller Are Best Friends Over Their Shared Love For Dead Animals
Mitch McConnell Now Spends All Day Playing With A Turtle Named Franklin
The Dada News Manifesto Of Dash MacIntyre
Are MAGA Fans Too Different To Assimilate Into American Culture?
The Legacy Of Joe Biden On The Afghan War
Trump Reportedly Doesn’t Want Jared Kushner In His Next Administration
Donald Trump's Brain Worm Summer
Kamala Harris Will Raise Taxes On Unrealized Capital Gains Above $100 Million… Hell Yeah!
Dash MacIntyre's Podcast Recommendations
Republicans Want Free School Lunches To Be Spit In To Teach Kids A Lesson On Socialism
The House Freedom Caucus Just Unveiled A Ludicrous 2024 Platform
Mar-A-Lago Guests Say Trump Is Giving Off "Jim Jones Vibes"
The "Kamala Sneak" Play Of Replacing Biden With An Electrifying New Ticket
Kamala Harris And Tim Walz Vs. Fat Elvis And The Women-Hating Weirdo
MAGA Fans Are Mad At How Many "DEI Athletes" Africa Sent To The Olympics
Pete Buttigieg Is The VP Man For The Post-Trump Era
Joe Biden Is Now Doing Trump Impressions At Press Events
US Republicans Demand The French Olympics Be More Like Arkansas
The GOP's New Rules For Campaigning Against Kamala Harris
Democrats Take The Pole Position!
Project 2025 Will Bring Back Child Labor To Replace Deported Workers
Why Fascism ALWAYS Fails - Pt. II
Trump Created This Atmosphere Of Political Violence That Shot At Him
Do Patriotic Americans REALLY Want Trump To Abandon Europe And NATO?
Trump Wants To Take A Submersible To See The Titanic
Donald Trump Is Terrified Of Prison, And Is Turning Into A Recluse
Hey, MAGA Fascists: Dictatorships Always Fail - Pt. 1
Plots Of Famous Books If They Were About Donald Trump
Project 25's Creepiest Platform Planks
Thoughts On An Open Democratic Convention
Trump Claims Biden Will Mandate Every Marriage From Now On Must Be Biracial Or Gay
An Annual Reminder That These Are The Lyrics To The Ramones' "Now I Wanna Sniff Some Glue"
The 21 Worst Laws Red States Will Pass If They Win
Donald Trump Is Desperately Searching For New Lawyers
A Trump Interview Never Aired Because He Was Too Unfiltered Just Leaked
Milwaukee Breweries Are Making New Beers That Insult Donald Trump
Dark Spinoff Ideas For Characters From "The Office"
Mitch McConnell Has Begun Praying Multiple Times A Day To A Turtle God
A MAGA Fan In Iowa Burned Down His House Trying To Burn A Gay Pride Flag
Josh Hawley Gets Honest About His Former Addiction To Masturbation
All The Dead Presidents' Ghosts Are Haunting The White House
Donald Trump Is Hurt His Daughter Now Goes By "Ivanka Kushner"
What The GOP Is Campaigning For In 2024
Two Of Donald Trump's Chefs Tell All About His Disturbing Eating Habits
MAGA-Palooza Is This Weekend At Mar-A-Lago
Trump Has New Trading Card NFTs Going On Sale Tomorrow
Trump’s 14 Page Questionnaire For All 2nd Term Appointees Just Leaked
And Just Like That The GOP Is No Longer Talking About Hunter Biden
Trump Wants To Host (And Win) A "Dictators Only" Golf Tournament
Mike Lindell Claims Democrats Are Colluding With “Mole People”
Donald Trump's Mother's Day Message Is Classic Trump
An Average Day In The Life Of A Democrat
Come Pick And Choose At The Christian Bible Cafeteria!
You Can, Right Now, Have Your Algorithms Show You Only Puppy Videos
Noah Says He’s Sorry For Bringing Chlamydia Along On The Ark
If Republicans Were Around In Ancient Rome
Elon Musk Is Launching an "X-Verse" He Promises Will Be Better Than Real Life
Evolution Tips For Humans From A Visiting Alien
Guess The US President By His Slutty Pickup Line
No One Is Talking About The Appropriation Of White Male Culture
70-Year-Old Democrat Decides It's Time To Become An Angry, Racist Republican
Tuba Players Are Standing Outside Trump Tower And Playing When Trump Walks In And Out
"Fetus Dolls" Are This Year's New Christian Toy Trend
A New Howler Monkey Species That Pees On Each Other Was Named After Donald Trump
Donald Trump And Joel Osteen Might Start A New Mega Church Together
Donald Trump Is Suing His Grandkids For Violating NDA's He Made Them Sign
Trump Claims Democrats Want To Mandate Every Marriage From Now On Must Be Biracial
MAGA Fans Explain Why They Want Trump To End America's Democracy
Trump's Lawyers Are Putting Sedatives In His Diet Cokes To Limit His Courtroom Outbursts
Trump Supporters Sadly Just Aren't Assimilating Into American Culture
Abortion Protesters Are Now Protesting Polyester At The Mall
A GOP House Candidate Is So Homophobic Everyone Is Just Assuming He's Gay
White Supremacists Have Collected 3,000 Jars Of "Backup Genetically White Semen"
Donald Trump Had To Be Physically Restrained Today In Court
God: "For The Last Time… I'm NOT Pro-Life, And Never Have Been!"
God Admits Humans Aren't Even In The Top 10 Of His Favorite Creations
A Televangelist Claims "The Gays Tricked Me Into Doing A Gay!"
Republicans Are Worried Women Will Elect Biden In A Landslide
The Ghost Of Abraham Lincoln Is Haunting Republicans In Congress
A Day In The Life Of A Woke, Heathen, Gay, Socialist Democrat
Donald Trump Gave Himself A "High IQ" Trophy At Mar-a-Lago
New Yorkers Are Stockpiling Booze To Party For Days When Trump Tower Is Sold
The Guide To Whether Republicans Think Teenagers Are Children Or Adults
30 Insults For Trump The Biden Campaign Is Free To Use
59% Of Americans Support Ostracizing Trump The Ancient Greek Way
The RNC And GOP Are Choosing Trumpian Monarchy
Are You Living Your Life Like It's Your Greatest Work Of Art?
We All Have Trump Derangement Syndrome Because Donald Trump Is Deranged
The American Right’s Merger Of Christofascism, Ethnonationalism, And Greed
Trump Is Building An Underground Bunker Beneath Mar-a-Lago
The Strategies Behind Trump's Top VP Choices Dissected
Trump Is Asking Jared Kushner For Some Of The Saudi Money To Pay His Fines
Trump Says The Presidential Rankings Are Rigged Against Him
Donald Trump Won’t Let Jared Kushner Into His Next Administration
Lauren Boebert’s Tinder Profile Was Just Found
10 Tips For Donald Trump On How To Avoid Raping Women
Donald Trump's Dating Tips For Alpha Males Like Him
Kevin McCarthy’s Secret Agreement To Become Speaker Just Leaked
Donald Trump Is Now Teaching Bible Lessons At A Megachurch
A Call Between Trump And The Saudis Leaked, In It He Begs Them To Buy His NFT Trading Cards
Doctors Named A New STD “Neisseria MAGArrhea” In Honor Of Trump
MAGA Fans Believe An Underground Race Of Mole People Stole Trump Votes
Donald Trump Is Searching Far And Wide For A New Lawyer With The “It Factor”
A Secret Service Agent Revealed Absurd Things About Trump’s Time In The White House
Donald Trump’s Rallies Have Hit A New Low
A Mysterious Group Of Women Calling Themselves “The Cliterati” Vow To Stop Trump
Things NY Can Do With Trump Tower After It’s Confiscated
Millennial Congress Members Reveal What It’s Like To Work There
The Lord Of The Rings, If Donaldo Trumpins Was The Ring Bearer
I’m Trump’s Lawyer, And, Yes, Joe Biden Can Murder With Immunity
Noah Says He Maybe Shouldn’t Have Brought Chlamydia Along On The Ark
Eric Trump Says Bill Clinton's Sons Must Be "So Embarrassed Their Dad Is On The Epstein List"
Trump Says Lincoln “Rigged The 14th Amendment” Against Him
The Top Reasons MAGA Fans Are Actually Beginning To Lose Faith In Trump